I wonder what I'd do if I was a social

| Friday, October 16, 2009
By social I mean an anti-goblin: stupid and lazy and incapable of measuring myself, instead requiring the constant attention and approval of others. I would have no analytical skills, instead relying on personal biases and whatever data confirms what I already believe. I would definitely make no attempt to see the rationality of anyone who holds a differing opinion.

To start off, I'd create a blog. I'd give it a catchy name. Maybe use some alliteration. Since I'm a WoW player I'd focus a lot on WoW, so I'd use some sort of Wow race for the title.

What sort of subject matter would work? Well since I'm insecure and need to always find others to make myself look better than, I'll pick something related to gold. It's perfect! Gold isn't hard to get, so I can get a lot of it. And I can insult people who have less and call them stupid and lazy.

But I don't really want to farm. That's a lot of work. And if I farm, other people might buy my stuff and make profits from it. Then they might have as much gold as me. I can't have that. Instead I'll play the auction house, messing with prices to drive people away so I can monopolize the market. They won't fight back because they're stupid and lazy and think they have better things to do than analyze the economy.

Once I have gold I'll talk about it a lot. Then everyone will know how great and superior I am. If people don't notice me, I'll find popular blogs and start flame wars with them. That way I'll get the attention I need. Soon thousands of people will see me insulting them.

To make it seem more important than just a WoW blog, I'll make social commentary as well. But it will be the same stuff all the time: insulting total strangers and calling them lazy. It's hard work to think of anything new. Of course I won't talk only about the economy and insulting people. I'll insult people in any other way I can find.

I shall call it the Driven Draenei.

P.S. I'd also start off my posts with completely inaccurate claims on the etymology of words and then edit it without saying anything. 1984 is the best self-help book I have ever read.


Suicidal Zebra said...

*strokes chin*

I see what you did there

Copernicus said...

I don't particularly care for the greedy goblin, but I find your bashing of him to be distasteful.

Two wrongs don't make a right, and all that noise.

G-Rebel said...

A "greedy" dude once said that as a blog writer if a comment doesn't agree with your thesis, DELETE THE COMMENT. Wow!...I mean...Wow!

I'm all for the written annihilation of anyone who supports censorship and the curtailing of free speech. Have at 'em!!!

Hinenuitepo said...

I've disagreed plenty with said Goblin, but this as a bit harsh there.

Suicidal Zebra said...

Harsh it may be, but I challenge you to identify where it's inaccurate. ;)

To be honest I've never been a fan of his, and really the way that he's going through and pruning comments that point out logical inconsistencies in his arguments tells you all you need to know about his half-assed ideas on social dynamics.

The question is, will this prove as much a boost to Klep's traffic as the Ixobello/Tobold incidents did to Gevlon. Only time will tell.

Kelly said...

You know what, Klep, I don't read your blog often (been too busy NOT playing WoW and being a social, ie - going out and having fun IRL), but this caught my attention.

I also agree it's a bit harsh, but not as harsh as he can be... and your post is based on fact, not half-assed assumptions about welfare recipients.

Two thumbs up!

Stabs said...

He always deletes mine.

I think it's kind of flattering tbh. Nice to know someone thinks you're too clever to argue with :-)

Leah said...

I think I love you. in totally platonic internet way :P

Harsh or not, this description is truthful and right on the money.

I will never understand what is it that Larisa sees in him, but I guess she's just the kind of person that sees good in everyone..

Fish said...

I find any bashing of the greedy goblin to be hilarious and deserved, keep it up. . .

Kristine Ask said...


Simply brilliant.

Anonymous said...

OH I TOTALLY agree with Fish and all the other haters of Gevlon.

The more distasteful the bashing of Gev, the more I support it. I really hope that someone IRL kicks his ass and spits in his face.

Many may find me to be crossing the line, but in this world some people just deserve it, similar to how all those M&S deserve being taken advantage of and made fun of in return.

mzolton said...

Lol... nice!

There are parts of his blog that I like, but especially recently it has gotten terribly boring and repetative. I think he has run out of ways to make himself feel better by basing everyone else.

Anonymous said...

Nice post.

No matter what you think of the Goblin, this is still a great post.

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