Intellect is not a rogue stat. Did you know that?

Imagine that in your group there is a rogue in full heirlooms buy whose damage is terrible.  Upon inspection, he is in all caster gear.  An intellect robe drops.  He rolls need.
If you respond by kicking the rogue, then you're looking a lot like the person who was yelling at me (in the original intro, someone yelled at me)(omg beyond the scenes of the making of Troll Racials are Overpowered)(Original name: Lucas Starkiller)

Here's my pet peeve: Not explaining problems.

Let's look at that rogue again.  Is he a noob?  It certainly looks like it.  Note that he is a noob, not a ninja, at least it does not appear so.  Based on the gear he had and the gear he tried to get, it appears that he does not know that intellect is worthless for rogues.

Either that or he's obsessed with style.

Whichever it is, the important thing is to talk to him, rather than just shoving him off into a new group of victims.  Explain, politely, that intellect is worthless to rogues, that agility is a much more useful stat.  If that is unconvincing, invite him to mouse over his character sheet where it describes the primary stats, with emphasis on the part that says "Intellect: Provides no benefit to your class".

Alternatively, if he insists that he needs it for style or transmog, then explain the problems with that. Transmog is obvious: you can't transmog leather for cloth appearance.  Style, well that's trickier.  You'll need to carefully explain that rogues go for a leather-based style with dark colors and maybe knives, rather than flowing robes.  If he insists on dressing in robes, avoid using homophobic slurs (seriously, not cool) and instead use tribalistic cultural appeals, similar to why your company insists on a dress code and you don't let your children get their eyelids pierces.  The important thing is to talk it over first.

The wrong thing to do, and I don't just mean "impractical" wrong but "you're a sociopathic menace to society" wrong, is to simply kick them.  That puts the burden on another group without solving the problem.  Instead the rogue is likely to think that you're an asshole.  And maybe that everyone is an asshole, "Why do people keep kicking me?  This game is filled with assholes.  Well fuck them, I'm ninjaing everything!  I bet that druid won't like it when I take his agility gear!"

Assassinate Creed

You know that great feeling you get when you've been struggling with a boss and finally get it down?  That's how I felt after this quest.

It's part of the rogue legendary quest chain and is definitely a rogue quest.  You must not only sneak, but sneak well.  And sap too.  Sapping and sneaking and being patient and quick.  Patient and quick, that's a rare thing!

This particular part takes place in Gilneas, sneaking past highly-alert guards to assassinate a black dragon disguised as a human.  It was great to see the city used again, and used well.

It took me four tries, though I don't count one of them because I was just testing the circles.  Tip: the outer circle is the detection one.  The inner circle is... round.

But I triumphed!  Then I cooked some food to help me fight the boss.  And then I forgot to eat it.  But he died and I didn't.  Then they gave me daggers that match T6 quite nicely and sent me to go kill bosses in Dragon Soul and the other place which might be the same place, for a few weeks.

So let's hope I can get into the raids.  Maybe if I kill a guildy.  That's a legitimate rogue tactic, right?  Maybe not funny to joke about after the EVE incident...

Anyway, point remains, bravo, Blizzard, on an amazing quest.

Classes as Professions

My rogue is a miner and a jewelcrafter, a pretty terrible jewelcrafter due to having been reactivated only recently. These are not how she gets rich. Her true profession is as a rogue. She's a maxed-out pickpocket, optimized with a spec for faster run speed (and another for even faster when stealthed), a glyph to extend the range of pickpocket, and another to making unlocking those boxes instant. If she leaves stealth, it is with a killing spree, to wipe out any group guarding the precious locked chests. Her usual farming area is Blackrock Spire, mostly in the lower part since the upper area is filled with pocketless dragons and requires unprofitable combat to get in very far. Sometimes she ventures in Blackrock Caverns or random heroics, where can find all manner of flame-scarred boxes, rare alcohols, and a few coins as well. Notice how all of this is possible only because she is a rogue. No other class can pickpocket and only at some expense can blacksmiths and engineers deal with all those locks. Thanks to Insane in the Membrane, there is a small but lucrative market for heavy junkboxes.

What other class is a profession? None to the extent of the rogue. A mage may find a bit of gold here and there for portals and maybe food. Less often a warlock may find himself lucky enough to be in a position to execute a paid summoning. Once upon a time druids could sell their services as summoners of a boss who drops a bird mount that cannot fly. No more for them.

Is there room for more classes to have profession capabilities?

WoWing around again: Hillsbrad (Horde-side, just in case Alliance has quests here too)

"Yes, this horse IS made of STARS."

"Bears are soulless beasts put upon this earth to torment us."

"The mine spiders refuse command and are running rampant."

Yea, we're off to a good start.

Rogues, take note when shackling webbed prisoners: they do not die, they despawn. That means your combo points cannot be used for recuperate. It's a small problem given the general harmlessness of enemies, particularly when overleveled.

Moving on to other entirely unacceptable failures of game development: the murlocs do not flee.

On the plus side, Dumass is the best-designed escort NPC ever. Mostly because he acts like a normal escort NPC but has the dialogue to back it up.

Sludge Fields: Who keeps screaming? And then, like any good quest will do, the question is answered. But while we're talking about good quests, is it really necessary to retcon all the player actions from vanilla? I realize that respawns and that sort of thing were all necessary mechanics in lieu of a dynamic world, but did they have to rewrite the stories as well? It doesn't seem like a good way to bring back old players if every other quest says "you did nothing." The quest in question and the associated book were good reads, but would anything have been lost by renaming the NPCs?

I feel bad for Jenny Awesome. All the quests seem to have been miswritten and used "he", but the Forsaken know she's a she. For some strange reason, the quest to save the humans is not repeatable. Lost opportunity there, Blizzard!

Apparently the Forsaken have begun recycling. Oh look, Helcular is here, brought back by "a group of heroes" WAS THAT SO HARD!? Now if he'd quit whipping out his rod at every opportunity...

Quest objective: "Explain to Orkus that he is standing in shallow water." This all ended in sadness, and not just because of how the quest turned out.

Tarren Mill requires level 21. My time was done. But at least I got to fight angry slimes.

WoWing Around Again: Silverpine

Turn on the music.

First impression: Looks like someone is looking for a war. Big big Forsaken army, with lots of plague launchers.

You're just in time, Octondenub. It is Octondenub, right?

Grand Executor Mortuus looks at a sheet of paper.

Yes, that's what the paperwork says: "Octondenub."

Grand Executor Mortuus points to your name on the sheet of paper.

Yep, that's a Forsaken.

Garrosh arrived as I'd expect: jumping in and yelling the second he arrived. Things went uphill from there, with him actually sounding quite reasonable when questioning Sylvanas' use of val'kyr. Perhaps she could have phrased things better, saying that the Horde would lose its grasp on Lordaeron rather than the Forsaken. Maybe all the skilled tricksters of diplomacy died when the Apothecaries revealed themselves.

"They won't take out land without a fight!" - Forsaken soldier and something between irony and hypocrisy

As would be expected, the first quests involve ingredients for plague. And killing worgen. For which I was giving a Nubish Cloak. Like a nub, I was happy to get it.

I'm still not sure of the point of plague. It doesn't seem to actually be contagious. So it's a chemical weapon. But then I'm still not seeing the benefit over explosives, since it often seems to disperse quickly. I suppose it's one of those examples of how cultural norms drive weapon development. They died to plague stuff, so they make plague. I'm an American so I lean toward nukes and drones. Or ideally, nuclear drones (Get to it, Obama! We know it isn't legality holding you back.)

It really is an act of brilliance for a Forsaken to hide in an outhouse. It hides his stench. Quite clever. Poor Yorik.

After that there is more running. I see a very tall Ettin. It is elite and it wanders. Being so visible, it is a poor substitute for the Sons of Arugal, but I appreciate the effort.

"Goblins got us drunk" may be the worst excuse ever for getting your ass kicked by a bunch of Twilight fans.

"Within the butt of this bush chicken is a stick of dynamite." On one hand this means that the ettins are just another gimmick quest mob rather than a sinister stalker of nubs, on the other hand, it's a Forsaken quest involving an exploding chicken which is also coated with diseased organs, so that's a point up in my book.

I was sent off to kill spiders and rescue orcs, with a vague hint of 'if you see the broodmother that would be a good time to kill her'. Then I saw a rare spawn spider, but that was not her. So I ventured into the mine to find the broodmother, and found her I did. I got some nice boots. Then I broke out the victims near her and killed another spider (but not the last one for the kill quest). At which point I got the quest to kill her. Yet another case where it would be great if quest credit could be gained for quests not yet given. Apparently completing either the kill or rescue will trigger the matriarch quest, which is an improvement, and something I did not know quests could do.

Kill the refugees. Okay. That just sounds like a war thing to do, particularly for the Forsaken, who are unlikely to be shown and mercy in turn. Bring with a val'kyr to raise them as new Forsaken. Well... okay, I guess. It didn't seem like such a horrible thing back in Deathnell. Also, mind control them. Uh... With all due respect, Ms. Sexy Corpse Lady Queen, those are not new Forsaken, they are merely tools. The Forsaken are the free-willed undead, not slaves. If you want to kill humans and raise slaves, I can see the practicality of it. But do not call them Forsaken!

I won't spoil it, though it probably has been many times already elsewhere, but let's just say, that was a surprise, both what happened and the reaction of Agatha.

Then Sylavanas gives a speech which seemed to consistent mostly of cognitive dissonance with the quest I had done five minutes before. This was interrupted by a dungeon queue for VC, which as a rogue meant ending the cinematic so I wouldn't miss it. That seems to have broken the quest and I did not get discovery credit, so no FP from the Sepulcher, so I had to run back, then abadon it to remove the phasing that was hiding Sylvanas.

Then I got a quest called "Honor the Dead." This was paired with the similarly hypocritically named "Excising the Taint." The followup was triggered by the worgen killing and had me find a book. I can find books. Or I thought I could. Searching all over the place with no luck. No named mobs in sight, nothing. Eventually I was just running around without stealth. And got attacked in the barn. Huh? I didn't see anyone in the barn and I checked it twice! I see what you did there, Blizzard; you made a quest mob that spawns when the player is close, but not if they are stealthed, meaning that rogues can only do this quest once they are frustrated enough to run around aimlessly unstealthed, as opposed to being the purposeful, sneaky types that they are supposed to be. That's just stupid.

On the plus side, my brief trip into VC didn't totally screw up the mob levels. They're still green rather than grey. I'm guessing another dungeon run will fix that terrible problem of mobs giving xp.

Now I'm at the Forsaken Front. Does it ever not rain in Gilneas? I seem to be missing a few objects, because the quest herb and catapult shots have been replaced with blue and white checkered boxes. The ettin throwing boulders was a nice touch.

Then everyone died and everything was ruined. I don't think I've ever spent so much time as a Forsaken running away from imminent defeat.

So yadda yadda transimensional portal attunement, you know,a typical day. And then I saw a Witchalok. "What is a Witchalok?", you ask. Click the damn links! Also, they have doomskulls, which have a very high magnitude of doom. And, armies of wolfoids. Unless you're looking to take on a nearly-invincible elite, you'll want to avoid the doomskull. To top it all off, they are immune to sap. Can you believe it?

Godfrey really likes shooting people he doesn't like. Including other Forsaken. He fits right in. Perhaps too well...

The zone ends with a battle, in which I took no part because my job was to run really, really fast after Sylvanas while she shouted at people.

And that's Silverpine.

WoWing Around Again: Forsaken

Let's start not at the start, with a quest, a murloc quest.

An old Forsaken man is lonely. He has money, but wants a murloc companion. I guess all the dogs around are plagued. So I go to the beach with a leash and instructions to capture a murloc, which of course requires a bit of uh, let's just say pacification. Hit it until it is at low health and then capture it.

What do murlocs do at low health? That's right, they run. Where do they run? Of course toward other murlocs. But not just any murloc, oh no, to the much bigger and more dangerous rare spawn murloc named Muad. I'm not sure who named him.

But to get to the point: I died. Deadered. Then I ran back and found the a minor vilefin oracle has higher relative DPS than me. So I died again. So far I think Blizzard has done an excellent job with the new Forsaken starting experience.

Arise, Octonde, and with your new undeath, do what we tell you to do, because you have free will now.
I wasn't quite sure why the one guy whose name I forgot seemed to instantly fall in line. Sure, I suppose if I was undead I'd join the Forsaken. It's really the only logical thing to do if just about everyone would kill you and there is a group of people who will fight beside you. But the change was so quick, and the mention of the Dark Lady seemed odd. If I found myself undead, my first few thoughts would not include my obligation to help Sylvanas, even if I was planning to join her.

But whatever, at least the guy has hands now.

There is the usual stuff of killing non-threatening wildlife and whatever the local evil is, in this case Scourge who walk in circle.

The murloc almost killed me a third time. Maybe I should learn mutilate off-hand.

I might need it to take on this elite level 5 quests. EPIC FOUR POINT EVISCERATE FOR 43 damage and I live with only a few health left. Go me.

It felt good bringing him the murlock.

Oh hey, a Redpath. I remember those fellas. They're all dead, except maybe the one at Light's Hope, unless he somehow died too. My guess is that Varian killed him, because that's what he does, kill things to ruin everything. Like Onyxia. I'm still bitter about that retcon. Anyway, the Redpath decided to start a faction of Forsaken, but clearly failed at his goal of "having elbows" and so of course I killed him.

And then I went to go kill more farmers and steal their pumpkins, because sometime tradition is important.

A Scarlet Letter
Poor Lillian, scared to be undead. So stubborn. Why? Of course no one likes being killed and then raised as a walking corpse, but she seemed unusually resistant, without being one of the mindless types.

Hey, spoilers!

The daughter of the High Priest of the Scarlet Crusade. Wow. Now that's an interesting situation. The Crusade was at least nice enough to capture, until orders, from her father, ordered her to be killed. But what a strange thing to say "You were too dangerous in life, and now you're far too dangerous in death." What was she? He called her a witch, as if he knew of something. She killed him with some sort of dark energy. Yep, sounds just like the new Scarlet Crusade!
http://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif
Protip: there are a bunch of sea cucumbers clustered under the big rocks.

Poor Gordo never got his gloomweed. Why do they keep sending him to pick herbs?

Somehow the rare spawn Lost Soul gave me 1200 xp. Unrested, no heirlooms, no hacked-in xp potions from the f2p future. For reference, level 7-8 requires 4500 xp. Looking it up on wowhead I learned that multiples can spawn, so of course I had to go find them. I found one and it gave 900xp. Hm. Less because it was lower level? I didn't check on either one. Or is this some strange diminishing return mechanic so we don't farm it for levels? I need a third one to see if I get 600. While I'm at it, a fourth and fifth to see if I can hit zero. For science! Log in the next day and kill one for 1237, obviously that includes some rested, but my combat log isn't showing the xp, so I can't subtract the rested. But clearly not headed for 600, or zero. A level 7 one was up and gave 1200 xp. They all give 6-slot bags. Totally worth killing! Except this science experiment has put me a level off the curve, plus whatever the screwed up leveling was doing anyway.

Apparently Lillian has been busy. By "busy" I mean "busy killing over a dozen Scarlet Crusade." That's pretty impressive for an NPC. Plot doesn't have that much killing very often. On the way there I was surprised at how many darkhounds carry small vials of blood inside themselves.

Dealing with the Worgen infiltrators was pretty neat. I liked that they didn't do the usual "they have stealth but really weak so you see them from across the town", but instead had some dust clouds to see them by.

Leper gnome! Aw, he's so cute. I wonder if he's being literal when he ask if I've "drained them of their ichor", I assumed the gnolls carried it in their pockets, not their veins. He's a smart little guy though. He knows that the offspring always seek revenge, so logically I should go scare... tadpoles. But why does it work while stealthed? Either they can't see me, or they can, and what is less frightening than a rogue failing a stealth check?

At level 11 the quests are still of a reasonable level. I hope that is maintained.

Lillian Voss continues to be a badass. I'll leave it at that.

Time for Silverpine!

Time for another installment of Back In My Day!

Hell, everyone! Today I want to talk to you about rogues and some historical context. Also, the funny thing that I like to call "the pain and suffering of other people".

Let's pretend I have special effects like sparkles and a vortex that takes us to another screen with me sitting in a different pose.

Hi! This is a rogue spell called Sap. Today we know it as a useful and most importantly, safe, form of crowd control. While it can be difficult to apply, since the rogue has to get very very close to enemies and it doesn't work during combat, it also has the advantage that enemies don't really notice it. In fact, it was often useful for breaking apart patrolling groups. Sap one and his friends will just leave him behind. It's just like the Marines, but the complete opposite!

But Sap wasn't always so safe. In fact, it used to break stealth. That's right, if a rogue wanted to sap one mob, all the others would see him and get very angry. He is a rogue after all! Who doesn't want to kill a helpless rogue? That's where the expression "having the tables turned" came from, but now we mostly use it for talking about gambling. How interesting!

Rogues weren't entirely helpless though. Oh no, they had this great talent called Improved Sap. They could put as many as three points in it and every point made them 30% less likely to lose stealth when using sap. With all three points they would only lose stealth 10% of the time. This was fun an exciting for everyone! Just think of the anticipation. A rogue sneaks in very carefully and he's approaching the target. You know he's about to use sap. What will happen? Oh you hope, hope hope hope, even if the odds are against you, but maybe, maybe that 10%! Oh boy boy boy 10% chance to see him get totally flattened. Just imagine a handful of elite enemies suddenly notice him and just POW! Oh let me tell you, it was great. Of course the rogues liked it to, because there was nothing they loved more than risk-taking and chances. That's why they picked the class.

In fact, some rogues who'd had a bit too much to drink would play a game call Sap Roulette. Pick a pack and go in a circle sapping them! Of course it wasn't quite as thrilling as Russian Roulette, unless you somehow have a revolver with 10 shots. Now that would be a hefty gun. But on the other hand, if you shoot yourself in the head there's no durability loss on equipment, so those rogues were risking their pocketbooks too.

So everyone, next time you're thinking "gee, I'd love to sheep that mob, but it might attack me!", just think of the daring rogue.

Venemous Tome

Sidney's third tip: "Prototype. Prototype. Prototype. (Gnomes make great test subjects)"

I can't help but think that this is terrible advice. I mean, what sort of awful person would use a gnome for testing? The body weight will be all off on normal subjects!

How carebears have ruined WoW

This post will contain nothing but facts, so if you disagree, it's because you hate facts and American and are therefore a Communist. Europeans, you can just move along right now, along with anyone not from real America.

Rogues thrive on world PvP. By world PvP I mean people who are either afk or at half health while fighting ten mobs. With the addition of guards and sanctuary cities, rogue PvP became harder, but thanks to vanish could still be done. Then came flying mounts. By the time Blizzard added teleports to instances, rogues were all switching to sword specialization in order to get the highest possible DPS. While commuting seppuku.

This lack of world PvP also hurts everyone else. With a safe, carefree, or should I say, carebear, world, no one has to pay any damn attention. Situational awareness has plummeted. When players fall out of the habit of spinning their camera and character in circles to watch for rogues, or on some days, warlocks who will fear you into even more mobs, it's not a surprise that they also lose track of things like adds, fire, and adds on fire.

But how does world PvP come back? Simple: make it.

The fact is that world PvP cannot be based on any sort of encouragement or positive effect. Small rewards didn't make sand, I mean Silithyst, any more fun. Significant rewards will only work for a short time, until we outgear them and no longer care. There is only one way to cause world PvP: give us no other choice. Put summoning stones in vulnerable locations, such as anywhere, and make it impossible to summon from outside to inside an instance. Remove teleporting to dungeons. While you're at it, put a bunch of instances all in the same area so that inevitably players will run into each other. Or at least so rogues will run into them.

Getting chain-ganked by rogues also hardens players, giving them the strength to deal with wiping continuously for hours on end. After all, I've killed some bosses in less time than it takes to run from Thorium Point to Blackrock Depths while a raid is gathering for Blackwing Lair.

Carebears have also ruined gathering. It used to be that a mineral node was a serious deal. People might fight for days over a regular thorium node, until finally someone won Alterac Valley. Gathering used to be hardcore. Dismounting to mine or pick herbs meant you were vulnerable to someone else coming along to kill you. Now everyone is spread out and not flagged. The greatest happiness came when I switched back to PvP and got into the habit of killing anyone who even dared to glance at my ore.

Carebears encourage bots, leaving them free to bot away at bot activities such as botting. If instead they were killed on sight... Let me put it this way: I started this post talking about hating America and Communism and here's where it ties in: bots. The economic growth in China is not due to stealing jobs. It's due to stealing spawns. That's right, bots and gold sellers in WoW account for over 75% of China's increase in GDP over the past five years. Kill the bots and we'll stop those damn Communists right in their tracks as they attempt to sell us gold at market prices.

I can't see them, they can't see me.

I wish.

Horde rogues have it tough!

We sneak around as sneakily as we can sneak and just when we think we've seen all the sneaking that can be sneaked, it turns out a night elf was there out-sneaking our sneak. We cannot repel sneaking of that magnitude.

Maybe worse are the humans and their anti-sneaking technology. I'm sneaking and no one can see me for certain! Except those damn humans. They sneak just the same as I sneak, but they see sneak better, so I can't sneak near them.

I demand sneaking equality.

Step one: You get a rogue

It's my rogue in a box!

My neglected JC bank alt rogue in half-blues, half 200 epics, and a couple pieces of badge t9... for some reason she went to Wintergrasp. No resilience, no trinket, no PvP gear at all, and as previously stated, not even particularly good PvE gear. If anyone looked at her, she died.

But if by chance no one looked at her... well then she did a lot of very mean stuff. It turns out my sub rogue is pretty capable at being a sneaking, backstabbing, stunning (and not just looks!) annoyance. I even almost beat a warrior. Might have done it if I'd not forgotten that I have evasion.

Yea yea, anyone can do a lot when they blow every cooldown. I get that. But what else is to be expected when my other characters could nearly two-shot me? Actually I wonder... trinket, wings, some sort of damage buff... I wonder if I could instantly kill my rogue with divine storm. Maybe not. But fine, two attacks. If she could survive more than two hits, if she had the slightest health buffer, that would make a huge difference.

Her keybindings need work, being mostly set up for carebearing. Shadow dance would be much more effective if I didn't keep hitting my pickpocket macro.

Step two: I need some gear
This is the part that worries me. I don't even have enough honor for a PvP trinket, let alone armor. I could buy gear with badges, but we all know how DPS queue times are. BGs are also possible, and arenas, but the repetitive loss which will come from my gear state is a turn-off. My paladin couldn't even do this, and she's starting at a much better point.

Then again, my gear is so bad that PvP gear is dual-use, PvP and PvE, so I effectively get double the gear, at half the enchant and gem cost. Even losing, the process could be more fun. On my rogue I feel like I have options and some control over the situation. Stuns and blind and vanish and all sorts of stuff that lets me dictate how the fight will go. My paladin has some control abilities, but too often it feels like I just wade into a fight and unload tons of damage and hope that makes someone die. I couldn't do that if I wasn't at least putting out tons of damage. My rogue has more flexibility, and that might be what gets me through the grind.

It's also a new experience. Before WG a few days ago, she had literally zero kills and a handful of honor from a VoA. I'm still learning how to play sub in PvE, so learning PvP too is quite new for me. I like that. Too often I feel like I've learned most of what I can, all that's left is practice (boring!) and gear (boring!). But my rogue, I know I've got 95% left to learn, and that's possibly the most fun thing in any game.

WTF is my Gearscore says... FAIL!

Shuffle shuffle shuffle

"Shuffle? I don't fucking shuffle! I am a rogue. Shuffle is sound. I am silence. Unless I'm yelling. Fucking shut up."

My rogue isn't a very nice person.

"NICE!? I don't need to be nice. I need to pick all these damn boxes for you."

She's been farming Blackrock Spire for heavy junkboxes.

"And, and then you give them away for some shitty throwing weapon. Which vendors for over a gold! And then you destroy it. What's that sound? No not the imaginary shuffling. Yes that's it, money being destroyed. Idiot!"

You see, I've been working on building up my reputation with Ravenholdt, which means giving them a lot of junkboxes.

"Understatement."

She pretends she does all the work.

"PRETENDS!?"

She forgets that I was the one running around killing literally thousands of Syndicate.

"Oh the terrible sacrifice of doing your usual ret faceroll, except with targets that can barely hit back. I used to stab people in the face and poison them and pick through their corpses. Not all this thieving. I'm a rogue, sure, but I'm not a thief for hire!"

She doesn't get paid. I don't even let her use poisons because they take up bag space.

"Meanwhile I'm trying to sneak around the lower spire and you're up at the top hitting dragons in the face with that ugly axe!"

Which ugly axe? I have two, you know.

"The fuck it matters? I'm being quiet and you're up there waking up half the spire! Just the other day I was trying to sneak up to some sleeping orcs to grab a chest and they all jump up and I hear you spinning away and throwing hammers."

Pardon me, but I can be sneaky when I need to.
*triggers gnomish cloaking device*

"How many times have I said I want to switch to engineering? How many times? Do you have any idea how great it would be to have a parachute cloak?"

You have safe fall and don't need to be jumping off cliffs.

"And you do?"

Of course. I'm a paladin; jumping off cliffs with my feet shooting flames is very heroic. As I've always said: "Better smiting through technology."

"You're not a priest, noob. You have what, three other miners? You're a miner! The death knight, and the warrior too! You'd never even go mining on me, you prefer crusader aura."

The death knight has a name, you know.

"I can't pronounce that shit."

I know. You can't even pronounce my name.

"Yea, you're so cool with your fake Russian and fake German and fake whatever the fuck you named the hunter."

Folaksamba is not fake. It's made up. There's a difference.

"Fuck you!"

I'll expect another 60 boxes by the end of the day.
Isn't she nice? Kinda chunky though. I think because she never runs. Lazy.

"I am not fat, you armored bitch!"

Excuse me, why are you still here? My mailbox doesn't appear to have the 60 boxes.