A brief description of every spec

Sometimes people ask, "what should I spec?" or "what class should I make?" I tended to say something like "make whichever is the most fun." That wasn't much help though, how do they know what is most fun? I've decided to fill that gap by giving simple explanations for every single spec and class.

Warrior:
Arms: My PvP gear makes me good at DPS.
Fury: Please stop breaking my whirlwind with your sheep.
Protection: Follow the damn kill order before I kick you.

Paladin:
Holy: If I wave my hands, sparkles appear and you don't die.
Protection: I'm glue and you're rubber, whatever aggros you sticks to me.
Retribution: I get it, I have a small damage meter, but I use it well and it makes everyone else's bigger.

Druid:
Balance: Stop with the chicken jokes.
Feral: Turning into a bear does not make me a furry, it just makes it easier to cyber with them.
Restoration: I could either be a slow tree or I could run really fast and heal everyone and there's not a damn thing anyone can do to stop me.

Rogue:
Assassination: I used to be good at PvP!
Combat: I'm going to stand here in the open and pretend to be a fury warrior.
Subtlety: Please don't see me, please don't see me, please don't see me.

Shaman:
Elemental: Sometimes people ask me, Shatner, how do I hurl bolts of lightning?
Enhancement: I'm going to pretend to be a fury warrior, but I'll ruin the disguise by dropping these sticks everywhere.
Restoration: If I didn't have chain heal I'd be selling sex to the holy paladins sitting outside the raid.

Priest:
Discipline: No one knows we have a third tree beside shadow and holy, so I just tell people I am holy.
Holy: I make people less dead and complain that my stamina buff is weaker than blessing of kings.
Shadow: Melts faces.

Hunter:
Beast Mastery: Loyalty level 6.
Markmanship: legolas would have approved.
Survival: Of course I'm supposed to melee, why else would Raptor Strike crit more?

Warlock:
Affliction: On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
Demonology: And you thought Loyalty Level 6 was disturbing.
Destruction: Explode.

Mage:
Arcane: I would kick your ass if I could afford the spell costs.
Fire: I'd tell MC to burn in hell if it wasn't already hell.
Frost: Catch me if you can!