Fail in Dire Maul

| Tuesday, January 31, 2012
After my mage had a disappointingly boring Mana Tombs run I figured the only thing to do was to disappoint myself even more. I'd heard that Dire Maul had been changed, so I figured I'd go check it out.

Well on the bright side, the druid at the door reports the concept of the tribute run: minimize casualties to maximize rewards. It went downhill from there.

The doors are all unlocked. That means no need to carefully time when the second boss wanders away (Or is it third? Does the drunk one count?) to grab the key for the door. It also means no need for seaforium charges or the old kill guard, zone out and reset trick. But finally I killed the king, unsure of whether I needed an ogre suit for the last guard; at 80, before he was deleveled, he'd aggro if I tried to sneak around, but at 85 with him dropped by at least 10 levels, no reaction from him. Running back out, I talked to the guard, who said that maybe I could get the gloves from the weird elf. Except apparently now an ogre has them, meaning that not only did they remove the need to go to DM west and back, but now the chat text is wrong.

But the worst was when I tried to go to the ogre for the gloves. On my way into the king's area I'd hit the door, twice, which shut it. And it doesn't open. So I was stuck in there and ended up going to Area 52, directly of course, because I'm an engineer and that's awesome.

None of this should surprise me. Running to DM West and back to DM North is going to DM North a second time. And probably DM West a second time too. That is obviously unacceptable. If it isn't a random heroic, we are meant to run it once and only once. If it is a random heroic, we are meant to run it endlessly.

The Nazis have won the vote

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Is excessive hyperbole killing democracy?
Yes
11 (26%)
No
3 (7%)
Nazis
27 (65%)

Votes so far: 41
Poll close

Apparently 11 people think that overblown speech is a problem, but the even greater threat is that of the Nazis. Obviously this means that we should continue to call people Nazis, in order to counter the greater threat, and later on we can worry about whether this is destroying democracy .

WoWing around again: Everything

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Tesh had a time card. Tesh owed me gaming. So now I have a time card code. Or I did. Now I have a month to play WoW.

I did the logical thing: Jumped on my bank alt. I have no clue what I was planning to do there. My mail had bounced back to where it came from, and then vanished from those places as well, months ago. Blizzard says my time had run out in mid-March, but I know I'd left at least a few weeks before then. So yea, that stuff was long gone. Couldn't have been very important. (Good thing I can't mail legendaries)

Then I logged in to my paladin, stared at my abilities for a second, got mad that they changed the icon for divine shield, and then queued for a random.

Deadmines.

In summary: everyone was nice, no one seemed incompetent, someone was new so we had a few wipes, there were multiple DCs and afk-kicks, and eventually Vanessa died. I got some DPS shoulders that might be better. Or maybe not. I have no clue what stats do these days. For all I know spirit is now our primary DPS stat. But probably not, because they usually do those random stat reworkings on the patch before an expansion.

Oh, and I had a blast. Everything came right back, except for where my res key was located (right side bar, a little bit up from the middle). I got some sort of points, but I don't know the point of them. Halfway in I decided I should go to Molten Core, but didn't, because I had an instance to finish.

I then went off to the transmogrification people and was angered that I could not do anything with thunderfury. And then just to make it worse, my tanking weapon is a mace, so I cannot even use any of the cool old weapons I kept around, obviously just for this. I've been waiting a long time... After I converted my tanking set to Soulforge I stuck that in void storage, because my bank was so filled with crap that I had overflow into my bags.

Oops, just did Sethekk Halls not on heroic. Go through again... what the hell is Anzu doing here? They eliminated most of the trash past him, I guess so we can more safely pull him. Smart move there, but I think I'd feel a bit cheated if I was a druid. Then I realized I'd already gotten the item from there. To Hellfire!

I joined a group that was running Black Temple, so I could get a mace that doesn't look ridiculous. If only I could use swords for transmogrification! I have so many awesome 1h swords. It was fun, though I still don't like BT much. But I did get another polearm. I'm currently using the Blood Elf starting area weapon, which matches Judgement, and I think is funny to have Alliance-side.

Then a few of us went to Hyjal and cleared that with three people. The warlock and I both get two or three of the set pieces. They kept dropping in pairs, so we didn't need to compete. Now I have 5/8 Lightbringer.

Someone in trade chat complained about being bored. I suggested leaving for a year. They thought I was being sarcastic...

My plan now is to first go to the old vanilla instances and see what terrible things have happened to them. Then I'll putter around. Before the month is up I want to try LFR and maybe even a real raid. Also those troll places. And MC of course.

Random impressions:

2.5g is not worth losing my keys. What the fuck was wrong with keys?

Noticed that randoms are 7x weekly rather than 1x daily. I like that a lot. Great change there.

15 minute hearthstone? Holy hell, that's short.

What can we do with all this stuff we have laying around?

| Monday, January 30, 2012
If you've wasted any amount of time reading about PC gaming, you've probably read at least something about this or that game having old code and content, not active, but left in the game. Half of it doesn't work and never will because it's incomplete. But sometimes there are useful bits left in there. Modders love this stuff, because it's a jump-start on being able to add new content. Re-enable a disabled enemy type, give it some spawn points, fix the hit box, and bam, you've got more content. I've not yet tried it, but KOTOR2 had a lot of this stuff left over, cut by a rushed schedule, leaving modders with a lot of material to work with. How glad we should be that they didn't prune it!

WoW had this as well. As expansions accumulated, so did the random stuff with no apparent purpose. Quest chains that seemed to end too soon. Ominous bosses. Factions which increased, but for no apparent benefit. Nooks and crannies in instances. Why was it there? For some grand plan? Were they setting it up for a Soviet-style five year plan to use it in five years and then send it to a work camp? I doubt it, and not just because of the image of a Blue sending a cut troll boss to Siberia.

Instead, I think they were just being thorough and sloppy. Why did Shendrelar have a reputation? Maybe it adds some sense of consistency, of "thanks for bringing us books, bring a hundred more for a discount on things you'll never buy*". It was consistent in the way that slapping a reputation on everything is consistent. And utterly nonsensical. The result was a faction that existed for basically no point at all.

Ravenholdt Manor was similar. Rogues needed some place for a class quest, so they got it. And then for no apparent reason, the guards there were a faction. Maybe it's a coding thing, that guards need a faction to properly kill you for misclicking on a PvP server. Or it's just insanity, a theory which is supported by the existence of not one, but two grinds for increasing reputation, both based on rogues, and none of them giving any material benefit. Though the guards are nicer.

WoW ended up with a lot of shit laying around.

If they were truly polishing everything, they'd get rid of it. What is it doing? Taking up space? Wasting space in the intertubes for one more mob, one more zone, one more pixel of pointless existence. These are all shit left around by developers who clearly could not be bothered to go back and clean up the mess they left.

And good thing they didn't!

Going back to Insane in the Membrane, what was that achievement? It was the cobbled-together pack of utterly pointless reputations along with one essential one for the well-dressed pirate. Can you imagine trying to create that these days? There just aren't enough useless, left-over, backwater nothing factions to work with. There are no bits of scrap laying around for the found art project which is this achievement.

But that's not all!

Reduce (didn't happen), reuse (coming to that), recycle (lol, every boss in MC).

Blizzard was a strong practitioner of the Reuse model. They created the Dungeon 2 set, which all the cool people called tier .5, since of course the dungeon set was tier 0. If you're unsure what I'm talking about, imagine if the set pieces that you normally purchases from vendors in Stormwind (which is so annoying for Horde characters needing to run all the way over) were instead random drops, and they came from bosses in instances, scattered all over the place, so that running the same place a million times wouldn't get you a full set. Instead you'd need to run a dozen places a million times, because some jackass ninjaed your set piece. I also once got an epic staff on my warlock, which the nice priest passed on, thanks to my cunning plan of not ninjaing his drop earlier in the run, and then I got called a ninja for having it. Apparently I should have forced the priest to take it. But I have once again rambled on about something entirely unrelated. Maybe after a few dozen years and a touch of dementia this will be understandable behavior.

Okay, tier .5, what would you do if you wanted to add a bunch of new content and a quest chain that tells a neat story and upgrades a set of gear? Okay yes, you could tell people to run heroic ICC and trade in their tier pieces, but that doesn't have a different story and dear god, I cannot believe anyone willingly ran that place again after killing Arthas Mc Jackass the first time.

Or, you could go with the slightly less lazy route and tell a story we've never heard before. In this story a set of adventurers went off and got something awesome, then promptly found themselves cursed by how awesome it was, before finally it destroyed everything they had ever held dear to them. I think it was supposed to teach us a lesson about legendary items and guilds. These adventurers met terrible fates in the very same instances you'd farmed mere hours before. So of course you have to go back and kill them, because that's how we solve problems. Anyway, they went back through the instances and added in strange new boss fights with strange new gear. Imagine if mages and warlocks got a special set, a set whose special qualities included extra armor and basically nothing else. And it was awesome. But that's exactly what I'm trying to get at: when they needed more content, they already had all this places, some unused, some slightly used, like stuff from your garage that you'd sell on ebay, and they stitched it all together into a very nice quilt.

I'm not adequately explaining what a nice quilt this way. Across the story they manage to draw in other stories, everything from demons to undead to angry dwarves to not-entirely-mentally-stable elves. Remember those utterly pointless Shendrelar? Well there you go: They're being used again (technically the Insane used them second, but I like to tell my stories out of order). It's like a web of conspiracy we'd ask Glenn Beck to create, showing how the Argent Dawn, Orgrimmar, Silithus, Dark Iron dwarves, demons, and a whole pile of gold out of your pockets are all connected. DON'T YOU SEE? AM I JUST CRAZY OR IS IT JUST ME!?

Unfortunately, Burning Crusade failed to create quite so much random crap to work with, leaving the developers with no choice but to create new content. It was a terrible shame. Wrath of the Lich King did even worse, creating a nice clean continent with only a few stray dragon portals to tie in to. Then the Cataclysm came and all the useless crap was swept away, never to be seen again, and that made me a bit sad.

A highly polished experience is a good thing to have in a game. But a highly polished world, not so much. If we wander off the tracks and go poking around, we should find something dirty. Think of the stories. In one story the world is a perfect mess with grime everywhere. In another, the world appear perfectly clean, but if you go behind the wrong door you will find the horrifying mess. But in the most terrifying world, everything is clean everywhere, and that's how you know it's a nightmare which you cannot ever escape.

I agree, all the liberals should be deported

| Sunday, January 29, 2012
We need to let President Obama, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, (audience boos) and my dear friend the chairman of the Democrat National Committee, we need to let them know that Florida ain't on the table," West said. "Take your message of equality of achievement, take your message of economic dependency, take your message of enslaving the entrepreneurial will and spirit of the American people somewhere else. You can take it to Europe, you can take it to the bottom of the sea, you can take it to the North Pole, but get the hell out of the United States of America. - Rep. Allen West

I think this is a great idea. Not the bottom of the sea part, but the not in America part. America has been called "The Great Experiment", well this can be "The Even Bigger Experiment". Put all the leftists in Europe, all the conservatives in America, and whoever is left over can wander the earth forever with a candle in a turnip.

This would truly be a grand experiment. Finally we can properly test socialism and capitalism, with each run by ideologically pure people. In America there would be no socialism at all while in Europe there would be no capitalism at all.

Here's the practical implementation:
Create a $10,000 per year "liberal tax", which liberals must pay. This is retroactive to all years as a liberal, though much like parking garages, if you cannot prove your time as a liberal, then you must pay the full lifetime fee. This is only reasonable, because those old liberals have been taking social security for a long time. The immediate effects would be two-fold: first, about 20% of the debt would be paid off instantly and second, the liberals would leave America. It's not all stick. As a farewell present there would be one last socialist program: free plane rides to Europe.

Then America can finally be pure and free to prosper. Meanwhile, Europe can see how it is having a horde of uncultured immigrants who don't speak the language. And finally, President Gingrich can sign legislation outlawing the existence of Mexico, thereby fixing all problems, forever.

I'd rather have bots

| Friday, January 27, 2012
When I make friends in a game, I want to play with them. If they're not on, but I still want to progress, what should I do?

I could hope that enough people are online on my server so I can form a group. This used to be the method, but was rejected.

I could play with people from other servers who I will never see again. This is the current method.

I could play with bots, which, if we given them a slightly randomized AI and name generation are functionally identical in all positive aspects to the people from other servers. I will never play with them again. I will develop no ties to them, because I will never see them again.

There is a benefit to bots. A social benefit, in fact. Since I likely have no concern for the random players, I am likely to treat them worse than I would friends or same-server players. Not with cruelty, but you cannot expect generosity in this situation. I have every incentive to take all I can, without regard for their needs or desires.

If they are already dehumanized, why not replace them with non-humans and minimize the damage inflicted upon the helpless other?

P.S. I'd rather play with the friends I made from the first scenario.

New Blog Appearance

| Thursday, January 26, 2012
I changed a few things around here. Deleted some clutter. Changed some color. Got a new template which also knocked out my google code, so I missed several days of seeing how many of you came here looking for Skyrim porn. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you? What part of "troll racials are overpowered" sounds like a porn site? Though incidentally, I recall a study (I'm using the term loosely) which found that, contrary to blood elves being 'gay', trolls actually were depicted more often in gay warcraft art, though I don't recall if they had done anything to compensate for trolls being out longer (zing). I have no idea why I remember that. But while we're on the subject, I also recall a study that found that children of gay parents were slightly happier than straight parents. I can only assume this is because of a total lack of moral standards, since as any Puritan could tell you, "A Penny Saved is a Penny Burned," referring to their practice of burning children who might become witches, often refereed to as "pennies".

Anyway, does anyone have any thoughts on the appearance? Better? Worse?


It's like my parents always told me: "If you don't have anything nice to say, it's because you're surrounded by losers. Point that out."


P.S. "alexstrasza porno picture"? Also, why did someone have to specify "free skyrim porn"? Was he finding nothing but pay sites? Should I be terrified by the possibility that premium skyrim porn is a potentially commercially viable enterprise?

A rep grind by any other name...

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Back in the dark ages, before I met other smart people in high school, before I had a PC in college, I had a Mac and not many games to play. But I had a few and a few good ones. One of those was Escape Velocity, a 2D game of space exploration, trade, and combat. It was a glorious game with many quests and stories to find and a great deal of flexibility. I'd almost call it a sandbox. I'm pretty sure it is still available to pay for (it's shareware). The first in the set was a solid bit of fun, though the mechanics of it meant that even if you'd helped one faction or another win, the galaxy didn't change very much. The second fixed this by adding a neat scripting system which could change planets based on certain mission results and ended up being, in my opinion, the best of the three. Finally the third added a ton of cool mechanics which made combat more interesting and had some pretty awesome storylines, but seemed to have gotten too big and too complex, in addition to having a strange method for picking a faction. Strange as in, oops, I seem to be a pirate now, or oops I seem to be a telepath who has been enslaved by the government and can only break free and play the game normally by going really far along the mission string. It was still a great game, just not quite as good as the second. But that's way more introduction than I intended.

The game had the option to demand tribute from planets. At first they'd just laugh at you and maybe get a bit mad too. But, if you had a dangerous enough reputation, they'd send out their defense fleet. Kill it all and they'd pay tribute every day. This was a handy way to be able to land on planets that sold cool stuff or were convenient save points (saving was done by landing on a planet, which made some exploration especially risky) even if the government of it was hostile, maybe because you'd been pirating their shipping for a few months.

The problem was that the combat rating system was... let's go with stupid. It was based on the number of kills you had, modified by the strength of the ships. This was a sum, rather than expression of the actual difficulty of any particular fight. Conceivably one could gain the highest combat reputation just by killing shuttles, the beginner ship which is more or less helpless. Conversely, destroying the most powerful ships around did not mean you'd have a high combat rating. It was a grind.

And it was as stupid in appearance as most rep grinds and their associated quests. "We'd love for you to save our town, you certainly look capable, and all those other people like you, but first, we need you to kill a hundred boar, so we know we can trust you enough to tell you to kill a hundred elves." Similarly, you could be flying a powerful ship, captured by your previous slightly less powerful ship, and still have a low combat rating. "Normally we'd kill you, but look at you, a Confederate Cruiser with added photon turrets, another neutron cannon, and improved shields and armor? Really? Come back after you've killed a few shuttles, and maybe we'll be impressed."

I'm not really opposed to rep grinds or requirements, but sometimes it seems sensible to have the game recognize that the player isn't random scum off the street, but is instead very well armed lowly scum off the street who will do anything for some money and doesn't care who ends up dead.
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