Morons of the week

| Monday, May 31, 2010
Golden Pearls (used for the vanilla 30 SP to weapon enchant) go for around 90g. Some total moron who cannot take half a second to double-check his auction misses a zero and puts up a pair at 9g each.

Of course someone buys them. Smart buyer, right? More like even bigger moron.

The seller made a careless mistake. The buyer, he willfully acted against his own profits. He sent a 162g, the difference between 2@90 and 2@9, to the seller and explained why.

The seller responded with a grateful, if poorly-typed letter.

And maybe that generic community that Larisa says we shouldn't call a community, maybe it got a little bit better.

Where's there to explore?

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A long time ago, on an account far far away, I did some hopping. And more hopping. And then I discovered the Land of Broken Terrain Textures. It was in this land that I eventually made my way to the airport at the top of Ironforge.

I had a grand time. This was a new place to me. I'd read no strategy guides, I'd seen no quest givers, nothing was there except pure, uncut world. This was discovery! Adventure! Exploration! Up there is a battle between trolls and dwarves and a few planes and runways. How grand!

Ah, but for risk of the ban. Blizzard doesn't much like people going to these areas. We're not supposed to peak behind the stage. I cannot claim that people have been banned for such exploration, but I have heard of GMs booting people out. As time goes on they patch up more and more areas. At one point there was an 'easy' path from southern Winterspring to Hyjal. You can find screenshots around; it is a grand area, which I've never been fortunate enough to see for myself.

I also did some hopping in Winterspring and found my self near, but not quite in, Felwood. The view was magnificent. A bit more hopping and running took me off a very long cliff, dropping me somewhere in Darkshore, but not Darkshore, surrounded by trolls. You can see it flying overhead. What a strange place. It made me think of Naxxramas.

You might remember the statistics: only a few percent of players saw the original Naxx. The devs didn't like this much. No one was seeing their amazing work. Who sees the troll village? Few people. Not so many fly over it, and how much can they see from there anyway? People tend to tab out when flying anyway. I imagine just as many people saw Naxxramas floating in the sky, but that's hardly equal to fighting in it. Naxx was remade in an expansion and many more people saw it. I've heard that the troll village is also being tweaked, opened up, and so people will see it.

But I ask, why? I understand the desire to display one's creation. That is not my question. But why hide it in the first place? There are many places in the world which are as well-made as any we would ride past on a quest, but they are closed to us; behind walls and up cliffs. Explorer types search for ways in, breaking into Ahn'Qiraj before Brann did, before Silithus was remade. It isn't easy and it results in to tangible rewards. So few people go there. Those who do, find what they seek: the joy of discovery. Is anything else needed? I think not. It's the only truly optional content: no artificial rewards, no grinds, nothing except what players find when they seek.

Artists want their work to be seen. Or at least their work which they think is good enough to be seen. You might find an artist who refuses to show work but insists it is worth seeing. That is actually just a crazy person pretending to be an artist. It is best to move along your way and not get lost in analogies, which I'm pretty sure I didn't use in this paragraph. This leads to the question: why is the art of Blizzard being hidden? There are three possibilities: they feel it is incomplete and not worth seeing, they are crazies pretending to be artists, or some outside malevolent force blocks it regardless of their wishes. Some people call that management.

The incomplete art theory is backed up by the construction signs in Hyjal. However that seems like a rather half-ass solution. We know WoW can have invisible walls. Why not set one around Hyjal? It sounds simple enough, but if I know anything about programming and design, it's that things never are. However I am currently wearing my Ignorant Commentator hat, so I get to claim that it would be simple and Blizzard is just lazy and stupid for not doing that. But lazy and stupid don't really explain much. It's like claiming that speeding causes cars to crash, forgetting the importance of the existence of things to crash into, so speeding is helpful, but not sufficient.

The sanity of Blizzard is something one could question. They did, after all, create quite a few insanity mechanics, a god of insanity, a metal of insanity, an insane god, an achievement, another achievement, and mechagnomes. However insane people tend to be shitty artists, whereas Blizzard has created quite a bit of good art. I cannot claim that they are insane people pretending to be artists.

That leaves the malevolent bureaucracy, management, authority, The Man, whatever you wish to call it. This appears to be the most complete explanation. It explains why areas are deemed off-limits without being properly blocked. Only an entity of evil would create a world nearly devoid of exploration (it's too damn small and we get pushed everywhere by quests), with the exception of a few strange areas, which are then used as excuse to attack the account. In other words: It's a trap. This leads to the logical solution: We must destroy the Death Star and kill Emperor Palpatine so that we can once again explore Azeroth and dance with Jawas. Blizzard, tear down this wall.

In the meantime, we must content ourselves with moving about the world in a way which is unexpected and unintended, but not quite against the rules. Get off your flying mount and see the world on foot. Stop flying over the troll villages of Storm Peaks and Icecrown. They're figurative villages, so don't go claiming they're not there. Look at them up close and see how different the world looks when you're not zipping over it in half a second.

Questions normal people don't have to ask

| Sunday, May 30, 2010
How long have I been wearing a pirate hat?

Adam, you're on the blasphemous heathen watch list

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Is there a God? Really now? Is there a God? Of course there's a god! You doubtful ones sicken me.

Oh but, faithful readers, it gets worse: He starts his own religion. Let me make it perfectly clear for you and him: there is only ONE True Path of the Light.

Capture Your God
Imprison It in the Basement
Drain Its Power

That's all. This new age soft nonsense of capturing leftover essence or some nonsense like that... NONSENSE.

I'll give the old human priests a break. They didn't know better back then. But the prophet, Naaru, has come and we have Heard his cries for Peace and we have Ignored them and we have Prospered under his Stolen Blessing.

Amen.

My attempt at randoms on my rogue

| Saturday, May 29, 2010
She's not all that geared. A few epics here and there, nothing badge or raid, just a 200 or 219 from heroics or ToC. Easy target for gearscore. Even worse, I'm using a new spec, a sub spec that I'm not quite used to, so DPS meters aren't likely to be my friend.

Nothing the slightest negative happened aside from a mispull. Well, almost silent, except one Forsaken who was unhappy that he wasn't as pretty as all the elves.

Is it time to kill Mario?

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Is Mario the only thing standing between us and math?

Some people aren't too happy with the increasing emphasis on movement in raids. Stand her to avoid the bad effect. Run over there to get the buff. If it is on you run to here. Some call it Super Mario. Indeed, World of Supermariocraft.



I didn't make that but I don't know where it came from. A friend sent it to me on IM sometime and I stumbled across it again recently. Moving on.

What would we do without the generic hop and shift and stand over there now there now there? Well we could... tank the boss, heal the tank, and attack the boss. In this scenario something amazing happens. Amazingly boring: Everything becomes easily predictable based on just math. Can your tank survive the attacks long enough for heals to land? That's a time to live and healer cast time comparison. Do you have enough damage output to kill the boss before enrage or healers run out of mana? That's a simple matter of raid DPS, healer regen/pool, and boss health.

Of course there is a third way, but we don't speak of it, for it has been exiled and deemed offensive. I wonder what it could be.

I'm a hero

| Friday, May 28, 2010
Someone posted 120 single infinite dust at the lowest price. This ruins any attempt to search without the assistance of addons, since any sorting by low results in a whole lot of spam, while sorting by high results in the highest prices.

Well thanks to AH addons which can partially automate buying, I was able to buy all of them with just a few clicks and a lot of waiting, time I used to write about how awesome I am.

I have saved the day. No need to thank me.

We will kill the PvE to save the PvE... vP

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PvPvEvP, only 10000g!

"What what what?" screams the Goblin alchengineermancer.
"I want to influence the mind of the boss."
"What what what!?"
"I have a lot of gold."
"Time is money, friend!"
"Ten thousand gold."
"Ten minutes."
"Deal."

I handed over 5000 gold and he began tinkering. He eventually handed back a hat which he assured me would grant control, for ten minutes, over Marrowgar. I gave him the other 5000 gold and went on my way.

I launched the next stage of the war, the most logical stage. Rather than put myself in harm's way, I would put my enemies in harm's way. Rather than attack the Alliance or the Scourge, I make them attack each other.

And so I activated my hat and began to mind control the add tanks.


It's the new way of doing hardmodes: with a player in control. For a mere 10,000g, you can control the boss against players who have activated PvPmode encounters. If you win, you get the loot from the boss. If they win, they get the loot from the boss, and 10,000g. They have four attempts before they lose.

Players can burn through content faster than devs can make it. But players can make content just as fast as they can burn it. Bring together PvP and raiding and make it last forever.
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